Wow! God is teaching me so much...

I started a new bible study last week.  Or should I say, joined a bible study with Moms at a local church last week.  They are in the middle of a book study called "Boundaries for Kids."   I thought, "hey, it would be nice to learn some things for little peanut."  Boy, was I mistaken!!!  God is blowing me away in how much I need to change! 

Last week, we discussed how many children, if not given the proper guidance, become reactive children and later reactive adults.  "Each child needs to be able to protest what they are against, do not like, or fear, or are in danger.  Being able to protest helps the child define herself, and to develop the ability to take responsibiity for her own treasures." (p. 151) However, protesting only defines the problem, it does not teach how to solve the problem.  And this next part is what got me the most... "reactive behaviors are insufficient because children who never move beyond reactive boundaries develop a victim identity."  It's healthy for a child to experience reactive behaviors, however, if they are not taught to become proactive, they become adults who are only defined by what they hate and have "difficulities with making and keeping friends, getting along with authorities, attaining goals, and finding talents, interests, and passions."
I am all too familiar with this.  God has revealed it to me that I have been living a reactive life.  I react to life, instead of pause and be proactive.  I did not have the guidance nor was I aware of this "problem."  I wholeheartedly believe that God has revealed this to me, so that I can take it seriously, and CHANGE. 
So my next question to God was "How, How do I change?"  It's not going to be easy, however, I do have something to start with.  In the study they went further to define Proactive Boundaries.  Taken from page 154...

• They go beyond problem identification to problem solving.
• They encompass both what the person is for and against.
• They mean others can't control the person's [thoughts or actions].
• they are not about revenge and fairness, but about responsiblity.

So some of these qualities I have learned throughout the years, however, I am still being molded into the women God wants me to be.  Lord, I am yours, please continue to show me how to change for you.  I cannot do this alone, but with your strength, everything is possible.

Today was my second time being at the study...It was a little bombarding to me to say the least-in a good way.  How can I teach and raise little peanut when I have so much to learn.  With God's help is the only answer!
Today God revealed a sin in my life that I was blinded to see myself.  Jealousy/envy/coveting!  Yes, I confess that I have not been living in contentment.  I would think we really need this item, how can we get it this item.  So, I would figure out a way and I would get what I want.  Lately, I have been wanting a van something aweful.  Even though we have 2 perfectly running vehicles with more than enough room until we three children!  Why do I want one, I ask myself?  Because the world says that I need one.  Mothers are suppose to have vans to make it easier, aren't they?  So, I pray that I can have a heart of gratitude and be thankful for what I do have.  Counting my blessings not once, but twice, and having my heart overflow with thankfulness and Praise to my Almighty God! 

Thank you Lord for teaching me so much these past 2 weeks, I pray for your strength to change my heart, mind, and apply what I have learned to my everyday life.